An Issue of Some Weight

I’m laying on the couch tonight with a headache and dizzy spells when I truly want to be at my gym, running myself until my clothes are drenched and I have to walk to the car bowlegged.

Right now, I sit at 210 lbs.  This isn’t a bad weight for a heavyweight fighter.  For a geek with large body issues, this is just plain heavy, man.

A little backstory: I was 300 pounds at one time, the majority of it all sitting in around my torso.  I was in terrible shape, to be sure.  Couldn’t run, couldn’t buy clothes off the rack, couldn’t think of myself anywhere near dateable.  Three years ago, I got sick and tired of it.  Bought a gym membership, forced myself to go every single day until I got to one eighty seven.  Six months after I started, I was there.  A few months after, I got back down to one sixty five, the weight I was at in high school.  The results were miraculous all around.  I even was nicknamed “Diet Kyle”, a name that I secretly cherished.

Now, due to sicknesses and changing priorities, I’m almost back to where I started.  I still go to the gym twice a week for intense training, but I can’t find the chutzpah to go during my off hours.  I’d love to set a new goal for myself, but it’s very hard to make one that I think is honestly achievable.  I’d love to see my abs for the first time in my life but that seems lofty, even the biggest exercise buffs I know don’t have visible abs.  This and , quite frankly, I love food too much to limit myself to the foods that will ultimately get me there.  Try telling a sad man not to eat chocolate.   I’ll wait.  …you see that face? exactly.

It’s funny to say, but Netflix is the biggest driver of my want to be at the gym.  Watching a show while getting my workout done (usually Star Trek, because you can take the man out of the nerd…).  I’m not sure if I should feel like that’s cheating or not, but it’s better than looking at myself in the mirror as I run.  It’s always great to indulge my techno-future lust by watching movies on my phone without having to download them.  It’s not a jetpack, but it’s close.

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